Parents Role in Social Media
Social media sites have become huge libraries
of digital profiles and young children, even teenagers are often oblivious to
the consequences of sharing their lives online. When creating a Facebook page
you are asked for your birthday to verify your age. Facebook has a policy that no one under that
age of 13 is allowed to open a page without verifiable consent from a parent. But many children lie to and open a page
anyway. Some parents are even helping their
children lie. Children under the age of
13 should not be allowed to open a social networking page. There are too many risks involved.
Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act of
1998 (COPPA) states that “if a website plans to gather information from a child
under the age of 13, they must secure verifiable consent from a parent and
publicly state how the information will be collected, used and disclosed
somewhere on the website.” Protected
information includes their name, address, email address, telephone number and
their social security number. Adults
openly put our personal information on the internet for anyone to see,
presumably opening the door for online predators to know who we are, where we
are and what we are doing, why would we want young children to do so?
Ask yourself this
question. If my 8 to 12 year old child came up to me and asked if they could
get a Facebook page would you allow them to create a page? Let’s take a
different approach; What if your child said, “Mom can I open an internet page
that will open the opportunity for my personal information to be obtained by
anyone, where I can post what I am doing, where I’m located, and maybe even
open the door for online predators?”
Would your answer be the same?
Children don’t think of these kinds of consequences. They are thinking of how cool it is to have a
Facebook page. We as parent need to help
them to understand the possible consequences.
Consumer Reports reported last year (2011)
that more than 7.5 million American kids under the age of 13 had joined
Facebook. Which more than 5 million were 10 or under. (Consumer
report June 2011) What I find even more
frightening is that many of these children’s parents are helping them get a
Facebook profile. Why would parents
openly put children at risk? I have
heard a few different excuses. Such as “I would rather help them get on line
then to do it behind my back.” Being active in your children’s daily lives will decrease their feeling
of the need to go behind your back. Another argument is that some kids
mature faster than others, i.e. a parent should decide if their kids are old
enough to expose themselves to social media. I can understand
that parents feel that they have a better understanding of their children. However we need to fulfill our main
obligation to protect our children and not put them in harm’s way. By helping them create a Facebook profile we
are teaching them that it’s ok to break federal governments regulations put in
place to protect minors. We teach them
to lie and that it’s ok because we said it was.
As stated before (COPPA) states that “verifiable consent must be
obtained.” I presume that if parents are
helping their children lie and create a Facebook page then that is their
parents form on consent. However it
would be unverifiable, not verifiable.
How
does Facebook get verifiable consent?
While searching multiple search engines for some time, I was only able
to find one article about how Facebook could create a way. Tony Bradley from pcworld states that “All
Facebook has to do is add a step that sends a consent verification e-mail to a
parent or guardian when someone under 13 sets up an account.”(web) Sounds simple, but what is to stop a child
from sending this email on their own or create a make believe account. Stating you are someone else is as simple as
typing a different name to create an email address. In order to prove my point I opened an
account with a different name. No one
asked me to verify that I was Sharpie Marker.
So I created sharpie_marker@ymail.com and
it worked out great. Getting
verifiable consent is tougher than it sounds.
Keeping underage Facebook users off Facebook is the only real way to
keep their private information safe.
We live in a digital
world that children need to learn about.
However, I agree with Dr. Gwenn O’Keeffe that Facebook is a poor choice
for young children to learn about the internet: "The lessons of
digital citizenship have to start young, but I don't feel that Facebook is the venue
to have those lessons occurs. A lot of
missteps happen on that site without a lot of coaching."(web) I agree that it is good for children to learn
about the internet, but the point that needs emphasized is that there are
better internet sites out there to help them learn. As an example my 3-year old daughter loves to
play on nickjr.com. She gets to learn how to use the computer and internet
without exposing her personal information.
At the same time she is also learning how to spell and count. There are a multitude of social media sites
that children can join that are, arguably, safer; i.e. Club Penguin, Kidzworld,
Webkinz and Imbee are just a few. These
social sites are presumed to be safer; however parents still need to be
observing their children while on these sites.
Sheri Bauman, Ph.D. An associate
professor at University of Arizona, Tucson states; “When young children
interact on Web sites with social components, the adults are less likely to be
observing each interaction…opposed to face-to-face interactions.”(3) Sheri’s statement goes back to what I had
stated previously about parents being a part of their children’s everyday
lives. Though I concede that children
need to develop internet skills starting at a young age, I still insist that
Facebook is far too dangerous of a site to build computer and internet skills.
Children need to
develop other skills such as reading a book, writing on paper, handwriting
skills, and spelling without spell check.
Exposing children to LOL and OMG may not allow them do develop the
necessary skills they should be using in everyday life. Not to mention face to face social skills. Neuroscientist D. Derbyshire observed; “that
while technology and computers have positive contributions, children should
have ample experience with in-person relationships before they start using
social networking sites” (2) A Good example of Derbyshire’s observations is my
little Brother who has grown up never knowing what it is like not to have a
computer. Although he has a great
education on how to run computers and the technology behind it, he unfortunately
has become socially awkward when it comes to face-to-face contact, even with
family. “Face-to-face interactions are
the most emotionally maturing experiences” (Cordes & Miller, 2000) When we
talk online he can talk for hours. When off Facebook and into the public he
becomes quiet, not sure how to start a conversation. My brother has had troubles finding a job
because when needing to have the conversation skills needed in many jobs out
there he has fallen short. Children that
grow up using social media sites may not learn the social skills needed to
develop as working adults.
Children under
the age of 13 should not be allowed to join Facebook. The dangers of not only potential predators’
but the lack of developmental and face-to-face social skills can be detrimental. As parents we need to help our children
understand the consequences of their actions online. Parents have that obligation to teach their
children those values. Parents are the
key roles in a child’s development.
Insure that they get the right direction.
Works Cited
Bauman, Sheri and Tanisha Tatum. "Web Sites for
Young Children: Gateway to Online Social Networking?" Professional
School Counseling; Vol. 13 Issue 1, October 2009: 1-7.
Bradley, Tony. http://www.pcworld.com. 21 May
2011. 21 June 2012.
Consumer Reports. "consumer Reports." That
Facebook friend might be 10 years old, and other troubling news June 2011:
unknown.
Daw, David. http://www.pcworld.com. 23 May
2011. 1 June 2012.
Derbyshire, David. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1153583/Social-websites-harm-childrens-brains-Chilling-warning-parents-neuroscientist.html.
23 Febuary 2009. 20 June 2012.
McHugh, Kenna. http://socialtimes.com. 16
March 2011. 21 June 2012.
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